Thursday July 3rd
Newcastle Entertainment Centre
Newcastle, NSW
White writing forms across a black screen as EAW's latest Outback Thunder broadcast begins. A voice accompanies the message on the screen.
"The following is a presentation of Eastern Australian Wrestling. The competitors in this program are trained professionals. Please do not try this at home."
The words fade from the screen, before some more writing fades in.
TWO WEEKS AGO
A video plays from the last Outback Thunder, showing a shot of Australian National Heavyweight Champion John "Mad Dog" Murphy walking backstage, heading towards the Gorilla position.
Darren: "And coming up next, we're going to hear from the champ, John Murphy!"
Before either man could blink, we see Dollar coming into the picture with a run from behind. At the last second, he lets out a howling yell as he clubs Mad Dog from behind with a double sledge, causing the champion to fall forward, dropping the title belt slung over his shoulder. A screeching sound can be heard as Murphy's skin slides along the concrete. In an attempt to stand up, Murphy finds himself the receipiant of a hard kick to the ribs, causing the champion to roll further down the hallway towards the Gorilla position.
Dollar: "You're never gonna make it to Collision!"
Dollar pulls Murphy up to his feet before cocking his fist back and smashing it into the jaw of the champion. Murphy stumbles back from the blow and is now against a table. Dollar grabs a nearby chair and swings it at Murphy who ducks under the chair and lands a kick to the midsection of Dollar. An attempt to pull the chair out of Dollar's hands results in Murphy getting the blunt end of the chair in the gut before having Dollar bring the chair down across the champion's back.
Johnno: "Someone back there stop this!"
Dragging Murphy along by the back of his shirt, Dollar and the champ move closer to the Gorilla position. With a grunt, Dollar launches Murphy in the air causing him to land only inches from the curtain seperating the backstage area from the ringside area. Walking with a purpose towards Murphy, Dollar stands over the Australian National Champion and as he is about to pull Murphy back to his feet, he's met with a low blow from the champion causing the #1 Contender at Collision to double over.
Murphy: "My turn, mate."
The camera angle cuts to the ringside area where we see Dollar flying through the curtain followed by John Murphy who is holding his side. As Dollar brings himself to his knees, Murphy is right on top of him dropping the challenger face first into the entry ramp with a DDT. The Wollongong crowd is on their feet as the Australian National Champion looks around for a weapon. Being close to the ring, Murphy looks under the ring for something to hit Dollar with. What he comes out with is a Singapore cane and a trash can lid. Wielding the cane, Murphy brings it down across the back of Dollar causing the big man to let out a painful yell, and a whelt to form.
Murphy: "Get up ya sonofabitch!"
Murphy brings down a second shot across the back of Dollar before grabbing the larger man by the hair and tossing him into the ring under the bottom rope. Tossing the trash can lid into the ring, Murphy quickly follows Dollar under the bottom rope where he grabs the trash can lid and brings it down in the face of Dollar. At this point, security and backstage officials begin flowing out towards the ring. Murphy has enough time to land a second lid shot to the head before three men dive at him, pushing him into a nearby corner. The remaining men surround Dollar in an attempt to keep the two brawlers apart.
Darren: "It's about time somebody gets out here."
The men trying to break up the brawl find they're quickly overmatched as Dollar breaks through them, blood coming down his face from a wound opened by one of the trash can lid shots. Murphy likewise breaks through and takes Dollar down with a double leg takedown. Before Murphy can land more than two blows on Dollar (who is covering up quite well), the backstage officials force the champion off the challenger. The scene suddenly goes black as a voice is heard.
Scott Carmichael: "Stop this! Stop this now!"
Johnno: "It's the boss!"
The scene cuts back in, focused on the owner of Eastern Australian Wrestling.
Scott: "You two seem to want to fight so badly? In two weeks, you'll both get your chances, but not against each other. Dollar, you're going to face one half of the Ruff Ryders in Shawn Kelley."
Dollar, shoving a couple of officials off of him nods his head and lets a sadistic smile cross his face.
Johnno: "I think he likes that idea."
Scott: "Mad Dog, you're going to face in a non-title contest a member of The Saints in "The Psycho" Bryan Willett."
The announcement of Mad Dog Murphy's opponent brings a surprised look to his face, but he too nods in approval.
Scott: "Oh, one more thing. Don't think I made these matches without placing a catch for the two of you. Not only will you two be in matches, but Mad Dog, you will choose what type of match Dollar faces Shawn Kelley in, while Dollar will choose what type of match you face Bryan Willett in. I expect you both to choose your opponent's poison in the next fourty-eight hours, otherwise I'll choose the type of match, and it won't be something you'll like. Good evening, gentlemen. And I use the term gentle very loosely."
Dollar and Murphy are shown in the ring, trading insults as the scene fades to black.
AND NOW...
AC/DC's "Thunderstruck" begins to play as a video package, showing the highlights from EAW's past shows cut in with the AC/DC music video plays, as the rough vocals of AC/DC's Brian Johnson is heard over the music.
"I was caught in the middle of a railroad track (thunder)
I looked round and I knew there was no turning back (thunder)
My mind raced and I thought what could I do (thunder)
And i knew there was no help, no help from you (thunder)"
The video playing highlights various moves, such as a Matt Carter superkick, a Brian Hollywood shooting star press, Sean Cain's ADK, the joint effort of The Saints and the Fallen Sainthood and Dollar's Rumble powerbomb.
"Sound of the drums
Beatin' in my heart
The thunder of guns
Tore me apart
You've been - thunderstruck"
The final shot, before the lightning strikes the screen, is of "Mad Dog" Murphy celebrating his title win, holding the Australian National Championship high in the air. The image shatters with the lightning strike, with the EAW Outback Thunder logo coming up on a black screen, before fading into an interior shot of the Newcastle Entertainment Centre in Newcastle, New South Wales. The crowd is cheering wildly as the camera pans around, some fans waving their home made signs.
Darren: "Welcome ladies and gentlemen, to another Outback Thunder. I'm Darren Jackson and as always, with me is Tim "Johnno" Johnson. Good evening, Tim."
Johnno: "G'day Darren. What a show we've got tonight."
Darren: "Indeed we do, Tim. Not only will we see Brian Hollywood in action against Matt Carter, Schmeid taking on Chris Deppe and a Tag Team Warfare match, but we will also find out what matches Dollar and the Australian National Champion "Mad Dog" Murphy had planned for each other."
Before another word can be said, the sounds of "Thunderstruck" cut out and are replaced by another classic AC/DC track in the form of "Big Gun."
Darren: "And here comes the owner of Eastern Australian Wrestling, Scott Carmichael."
The crowd cheer loudly as the owner walks out from behind the curtain and onto the ramp. He walks down to the ring, a slight smile across his face as he goes. Climbing into the ring, Scott is handed a microphone. He brings the microphone up to speak as the music and the crowd's noise dies down a bit.
Scott: "As you would all probably have found out by now, Eastern Australian Wrestling has split from the World Wrestling Association. Now there were some people out there who asked me if I knew what I was doing, splitting from a larger group like that. And then, there were people saying it was the best thing that we could have done. I tend to agree with those people. EAW is going to be a big name in Aussie wrestling, and even though the leg up from the WWA was quite welcomed, we felt that the EAW couldn't be as big as we wanted it to be while we were still associated with a company such as that."
Darren: "I can't help but agree with him."
Johnno: "And why not agree with him Darren. He's exactly right. We were being held back by the WWA. I'm glad we left."
Scott: "Of course, there are rumours running wild about why it happened. At this time, I'm not going to partake in these rumours and tell you all why exactly we left the WWA. All that needs to be known is that the EAW thanks the WWA for the help we received in our time there and that we hope they have good luck with the Collision pay per view. Now, we look to the future and more importantly, tonight's show.
Darren: "Totally agreed there. Let's focus on tonight, not be stuck in the past."
Scott: "You know that old saying, card subject to change. Well, I feel it hasn't been used a lot here in Eastern Australian Wrestling. We've been pretty good in not having to change the cards much. I think the only time we did so was the debut show back in March when we had a few no shows. Anyway, that's the past and we aren't here to talk about that. Tonight, I'm gonna have to pull out that old "card subject to change" line again. Now this isn't affecting the matches so much themselves, but just the order of the matches in fact. After I heard what matches Dollar and Murphy had picked out for each other, which will be revealed later on, I decided the match order had to change slightly. Now I could do another run down of the card and let you all know what the new card will be, but that would just spoil the surprise, wouldn't it?"
Scott smirks slightly as some of the crowd boo a little.
Scott: "Oh come on now, it isn't like I'm cancelling the show. Don't worry, you will all still get to see the same matches, just in a different order. So I suggest you all kick back and enjoy the show."
Scott hands the microphone back to Becky James, before climbing out of the ring again and making his way up the ramp as "Big Gun" reprises over the sound system.
Darren: "Well, you heard it right folks. The old card line up has pretty much been thrown out the window and now we could be seeing any match at any time."
Johnno: "That just makes things more interesting for tonight, Darren. Like the boss said though, he hasn't changed any of the matches, just the order they're happening in.
Darren: "Well, let's throw it to the ring for our first match up, whatever it may be."
Brian Hollywood
vs
"The Machine" Matt Carter
Becky: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first..."
"Perfect Insanity" by Disturbed plays from the speakers as Brian Hollywood enters on a Harley Davidson motorcycle and pulls up from the top of the ramp.
Becky: "From Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at one hundred and seventy five pounds..."
Red smoke with flashing white lights take over the background of Hollywood and his motorcycle. Hollywood revs the engine and then drives it down the ramp and around the ring.
Becky: "Representing The Saints..."
As Hollywood parks his bike, he starts circling his fist in the air. He puts his bike in park and then gets off and climbs into the ring.
Becky: "This is...Brian Hollywood!"
Hollywood goes over and starts working the crowd in all corners. Finally he clinches his fist and puts it back in the air and signifies the end of his opponent as he awaits for him in the corner as "Perfect Insanity" dies off again.
Becky: "And the opponent..."
Coloured spotlights flash around the building as the sounds of Linkin Park's "Bleed It Out" plays from the speakers.
Becky: "From Sydney, New South Wales..."
Some smoke pours out around the entryway as Matt Carter walks out onto the ramp. He throws his hands into the air, garnering some massive cheers from the crowd, before walking down to the ring.
Becky: "Weighing in at an even two hundred pounds...
Jumping up onto the apron, Carter steps in through the ropes and climbs onto the turnbuckle, raising his hands in the air again.
Becky: "He is "The Machine" Maaatt Caaarrrtteerrrr!"
Carter steps back down from the turnbuckle and stretches on the ropes, getting ready for the match.
As the sounds of Linkin Park fade out again, the two men step forward towards the centre of the ring. Referee Aiden Ross calls for the bell to begin the first match of the evening, as Carter and Hollywood lock up with a collar and elbow tie up, neither man able to get the advantage. The two men continue to struggle back and forth, until Carter stops pushing, allowing Hollywood to lunge forward, straight into a knee to the midsection. Taking advantage of the situation, Carter quickly locks in a front facelock, bringing Hollywood over with a snap suplex. Carter springs back up to his feet, working up the crowd, who cheer loudly for the local boy.
Darren: "Matt Carter taking the early advantage with a snap suplex and now taking a moment to work the crowd slightly."
As Carter turns back to where Hollywood is, he is met with a hard right hand, rocking his backwards slightly. Hollywood continues the attack, lighting up Carter with a chop to the chest. Forcing Carter back to the ropes, Hollywood whips him to the opposite side of the ring, before taking Carter off his feet with a clothesline.
Darren: "Matt Carter's early advantage was soon stopped short by Hollywood."
Johnno: "C'mon Carter, get up!"
Hollywood follows up, dropping an elbow to the chest of Carter, before taking a moment to work the crowd, who boo in return. Hollywood brings Carter back to his feet, before picking up the Aussie native and dropping him with a sideslam. Hollywood makes the cover as the ref drops into position.
1...
2...
kickout!
Matt Carter quickly kicks out after two, not planning on going down easy. Hollywood gets back to his feet and brings Carter back up, only to be met with another shot to the midsection, stopping him in his tracks. Carter drops Hollywood to the mat with a single arm DDT, before locking in an armbar, looking for a submission victory.
Darren: "Matt Carter now back on the attack, taking Brian Hollywood to the mat and locking in an armbar."
Hollywood fights the hold, slowly making his way over to the ropes. Carter keeps the hold on tight though, refusing to let Brian Hollywood reach the ropes. Somehow though, Hollywood reaches the ropes and Matt Carter releases the hold quickly. Stepping back away from Hollywood, Carter allows The Saints member to get back to his feet. The two men lock up with another collar and elbow tie up, and this time Hollywood takes a shortcut, landing a kick to the groin of "The Machine". The crowd boos loudly as Carter drops to the mat, holding himself in pain. Hollywood takes the advantage, making the quick cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Matt Carter is able to kick out again before the three, frustrating Brian Hollywood somewhat. Dragging Matt Carter back to his feet, Hollywood throws him into the corner, landing a few hard chops to the chest. He lifts Carter up onto the top turnbuckle, before beginning to climb up himself. Matt Carter is able to fight back however, landing a few stiff shots to the head of Hollywood. With his opponent doubled over, Carter quickly adjusts his position on the top rope, before diving over the top of Hollywood, grabbing him around the waist as he goes and bringing Brian Hollywood crashing to the mat with a sunset powerbomb!
Darren: "Oh my God! Matt carter with a sunset powerbomb and now both men are down."
Although this match hasn't lasted very long, both men are down on the mat. Hollywood from the force of the powerbomb and Carter seemingly from the amount of exertion required to perform said powerbomb. The referee begins the mandatory ten count.
1...
2...
3...
4...
5...
6...
By this time, both men have started to move, with Matt Carter up to one knee, while Brian Hollywood has moved to a seated position. Carter pushes himself up to his feet, moving over towards Hollywood, who is now on one knee. Hollywood quickly lunges forward with a tackle, taking Carter off his feet, before raining down right hands. The referee quickly steps in, telling Hollywood to break it up, who obliges, getting back to his feet. He steps back and waits as the man they call "The Machine" slowly gets back to his feet, shaking off the cobwebs from the sudden rush by his opponent. Carter grabs the ropes nearby, pulling himself back up to his feet. He turns, leaning on the ropes for support, before he is taken straight over the top by a running clothesline from Brian Hollywood.
Darren: "Brian Hollywood with a running clothesline, sending both men out over the top rope and spilling onto the floor here at ringside."
Again, with both men down, the referee now begins to count the both of them out.
1...
2...
3...
Both men have slowly moved back to their feet..
4..As they both turn around, Matt Carter quickly fires off a superkick..
5..but Hollywood manages to avoid it..
6..Turning back around, Hollywood tried for a superkick of his own..
7..and Carter is able to avoid it as well..
8..Both men quickly run at each other, taking the other down with a clothesline..
9..Once again, both men are off their feet and are unable to get back into the ring..
10!
The referee calls for the bell as Becky James makes the official announcement. Both men are slowly beginning to move again, getting back to their feet, using the ring apron to pull themselves up.
Becky: "Ladies and gentlemen, as a result of a double count-out, this match has been ruled a draw!"
Carter and Hollywood both look at the referee, and then back to each other, neither man looking happy at the outcome of the match. Before the commentators even get a chance to speak, Carter and Hollywood race towards each other, fists flying. Brian Hollywood manages to get a quick advantage, rocking Carter with a few hard right hands. Hollywood grabs the chain off his jeans and wraps it around his hand as Matt Carter shakes off the attack.
Johnno: "Look out, he's got that chain off his jeans."
As Carter turns back around, Hollywood fires off a hard right hand, right into the jaw of his opponent.
Darren: "Jaws of Life!"
Matt Carter instantly drops to the floor, but Brian Hollywood isn't finished. He drags Carter back up to his feet and puts him into a reverse facelock.
Darren: "Oh God, no. Don't do it!
Hollywood swings his body underneath Carter, wrenching the young Aussie's body around, before dropping him to the floor with a DDT.
Darren: "OH MY GOD! The Paper Cut! The Paper Cut! Right onto the floor. Holy *bleep*!"
Brian Hollywood gets back to his feet, raising a fist into the air triumphantly as the sounds of Disturbed's "Perfect Insanity" play from the speakers once again. The crowd boos loudly as Hollywood makes his way over to his motorcycle, leaving Matt Carter broken and bloodied. As Brian Hollywood starts his bike and rides off, medical personnel make their way down to ringside to attend to Carter, who is barely moving.
Darren: "Well folks, here comes the medical staff to check on Matt Carter and I've gotta say, after what we just saw, what else can we expect tonight?"
Johnno: "Whatever else may happen tonight Darren, I'm not sure if anything can live up to what just happened here. That vicious attack by Brian Hollywood was totally uncalled for if you ask me. Sure, it can make for exciting television, but to put someone's health on the line like that, wow, there is just no need for it."
Darren: "I can't agree with you more, Tim. Well it looks like Carter is awake and talking to the medical team, who are putting him onto a stretcher as we speak. We'll leave them to it folks and be right back after this commercial break.
The camera shows Matt Carter, face bloodied, being loaded onto the stretcher as the crowd looks on in shock, before the scene fades out and Outback Thunder cuts to a commercial break.
As Outback Thunder returns from a commercial break, the camera is focused on the announce position, where Darren Jackson and Tim Johnson are seated.
Darren: "Welcome back to Outback Thunder, and if you have just joined us at home, you missed a brutal ending to our opening match."
Johnno: "Hell, if you have just joined us, where have you been!?"
Darren: "Settle down, kid. Let's take a look at what happened just before the break."
A video replay comes up on screen, showing Brian Hollywood and Matt carter spilling to the outside of the ring, before a transition into the double clothesline taking both men off their feet.
Darren: "It was just after this moment here, where both men got counted out, that things got ugly."
Another transition and we see Brian Hollywood using the chain from his jeans to hit the Jaws of Life. The footage freezes again and changes to show Hollywood with Carter in a reverse facelock, before the image unfreezes, showing Hollywood hitting The Paper Cut onto the floor.
Darren: "Now it may have been Brian Hollywood's first showing here in EAW, but you can't help but think Tim, that he is being heavily influenced by his Saints stablemates, attacking Matt Carter so viciously like that."
Johnno: "I'd have to say you are right, Darren. I'm really quite surprised that Hollywood was able to attack Matt Carter like that, but I suppose it all happened so quickly that there wasn't enough time for the backstage officials to get down here and stop him."
Darren: "Well during the break, the medical team were able to take Matt Carter out the back and get him checked out. We received word that he is, in fact, OK and given the two weeks between shows, he should be fine to compete on our next EAW event. Time now, to head back to the ring, where we are about to start our next match of the evening, and I've been told that it will be the tag team match, when "The American Nightmare" Sean Cain will team up with Funnybone to take on the pairing of "The Hawaiian Hunter" Seth Colta and Omen."
Johnno: "How did you know that? I thought we didn't know when the matches would be tonight?"
Darren: "I have my connections."
"The American Nightmare" Sean Cain & Funnybone
vs
"The Hawaiian Hunter" Seth Colta & Omen
Becky: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first..."
"Dance with the Devil" by Breaking Benjamin begins and Seth Colta and Omen both walk out onto the ramp.
Becky: "from Honolulu, Hawaii and Brooklyn, New York respectively..." Both men walk down to the ring, Colta climbing onto the apron and turning to face the crowds, relishing the cheers as Omen slides in under the bottom rope.
Becky: "At a combined weight of four hundred and thirty pounds...The team of Omen and "The Hawaiian Hunter" Seth Colta!"
Colta climbs through the ropes into the ring and ascends the nearest turnbuckle. Omen makes a beeline for the far turnbuckle, climbing up onto the middle rope. Omen stares out at the crowd with a blank look on his face as Colta points out a random fan, lining them up, using his hands as a crosshair, then performing a perfect backflip off the turnbuckle. Both men prepare for the match as their opponents are announced.
[The intro beat to "Bedrock Anthem" by Weird Al begins to play]
Sometimes I feel
Like I need a vacation
Sometimes I feel
Like I wanna go
To the city of cavemen
The city of Bedrock
I'd be a Flinstone
Now I'll tell you why...
Becky: "And the opponents. First, from New York, New York. Standing at an even six foot and weighing two hundred and thirty-four pounds.."
Well, I've got I've got a woman named Wilma
Well, I've got I've got a baby named Pebbles
Well, I've got I've got a doggy named Dino
We do a little bowling and we drink a little vino
[The lights dim and spotlights begin to flash all around the arena]
Becky: "He is the King of Funny..."
Well, I've got a little buddy, Barney Rubble
Got a neighbor by the name of Barney Rubble
He's a midget but he makes a lot of trouble
Doesn't like to shave, he got caveman stubble
[The spotlights all immediately focus at the entrance, as Funnybone steps from the entrance, his hands in the air, greeting the fans]
Me and Barney, Loyal Order Water Buffalo
Lodge brothers, Loyal Order Water Buffalo
There's a handshake everybody gotta know
How come grand Poo-Bah always gotta run the whole show?
Becky: "FUNNYBONE!!!"
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
I get by on all my prehistoric knowhow
[Funnybone makes his way to the ring, slapping as many fans hands as possible, specifically the kids. Funnybone jumps up on the apron, before jumping over the top rope, bouncing on impact]
Betty and Barney got a baby named Bamm-Bamm
Little Pebbles is his number one fan
He's the strongest toddler in the whole land
Tear your arm off if he shakes your hand
[Funnybone waves his hand in air, as on the tv screen, his favorite phrase flashes (Shippa on you.) underneath him.]
Got a car, gonna push it with my feet now
Gonna take my family out to eat now
Jumbo ribs at the drive-in can't be beat now
Made from brontosaurus, baby, not a moo-cow
[He begins to dance around inside the ring entertaining the fans]
Wanna chill with a Sabretooth Tiger
Wear a loincloth, natural fiber
Be the first Rolling Stone subscriber
Got a pterodactyl for a windshield wiper
[He hops up to the top turnbuckle singing the song wanting people to join in with him.]
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Yabba dabba, yabba dabba dabba do now
Don't know what it means but I say it anyhow
[As the music fades, Funnybone jumps back down,crosses his arms across his chest, and falls backwards into the corner.]
"America! America! God shed His grace on thee...",
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
[The entranceway is bombarded by Red, white, and Blue pyrotechnics as the lights in the arena slowly dim giving the explosions a more prolific effect. As the last explosion fades out, as the sound of guitar intro of "Great American Nightmare" by Rob Zombie fills the arena.]
Dig deep down from Planet X, yeah
Thirteen ghosts in the devil's head
Step right up and feel the fire
Hardcore love of the never dead
Becky: "From Philadelphia, PA. Standing 6'4" and weighing in tonight at 242 pounds. Representing The Saints. This is the man known as "The American Nightmare" Sean Cain."
[He opens the curtain and slowly steps through it letting his eyes peer from under the American flag covering him to the ring. He then takes his left arm pounds his chest and before raising it slowly in the air. The fans begin to boo him heavily as red, white, and blue pyros shoot up in front of him. With the patritotic flames in place, he steps through them and begins to make his way down the ramp like a man possessed stopping here and there to berate or flip off a fan.]
Call me the American nightmare
Call me the American dream
Call me your soul corrupted
Call me everything you need
[Sean Cain circles around the ring and stops at the ring opening. The fans are on their feet hoping to be able to throw something at him without security catching them. He steps through the ropes getting a loud reaction from all those who hate him in the crowd. He doesn't care about any of it, he just stands there in the middle of the ring with his arms folded looking at everyone with great disdain.]
Yeah, motherfucker
Yeah, who do you love
Yeah, motherfucker
Who do you love, yeah
[He heads over to the farthest corner, grabs the top rope with both hands squats down to stretch his arms and legs.]
Black boots stomp and penetrate, yeah
Lust and death gone in your head
Rat pack mind degenerated
Thirteen ghosts sing the body red
[Now prepared for action he drops his coat outside the ring, crouches down in the corner, holding onto the top rope with his right hand staring up at his opponents.]
Call me the dark intruder
Call me the haunted sea
Call me your Monster Zero
Call me anything you need
[As the music fades at the end of the previous verse, the crowd is booing him as everyone patiently awaits for the bell to ring.]
As the four men decide who will start the match, referee Aiden Ross calls for the bell to begin the match.
Darren: "Here we go with our second match of the night, and it will be Funnybone and Omen starting things off."
Johnno: "This is going to be an interesting match. All four men are definitely mismatched if you ask me. After all, Colta and Omen were facing off in the ring several weeks back on our June 5th show. And don't even get me started on the team of Sean Cain and Funnybone. You've got one of the most vicious men in wrestling teamed up with Sean Cain, of all people!"
Darren: "You might want to watch what you're saying Tim, unless you want to be on the receiving end of an A.D.K."
Johnno: "No thank you."
In the ring, Omen and Funnybone are circling each other, before Funnybone stops and holds his hand out in the offer of a handshake. Omen looks around, unsure of what to do. Funnybone has a wide grin plastered on his face, and it isn't just the make up either. Reluctantly, Omen reaches out to shake Funnybone's hand. Before anything else can happen, however, Funnybone whips Omen back into the corner where Sean Cain awaits. Funnybone tags Cain, before holding his hand up in the air for a high five. Cain climbs into the ring, giving Funnybone a strange look and shaking his head. Seeming a little dejected, Funnybone climbs out onto the apron as Cain begins to work over Omen with a few hard right hands.
Johnno: "Well Cain might be quite reluctant to be teaming with Funnybone, but you must admit that the clown is pretty smart and also quite sneaky, fooling Omen into that handshake, before throwing him into the waiting arms of "The American Nightmare."
Cain brings Omen out of the corner with a snap mare, before landing a dropkick to the back. Cain is back on his feet in a second, bringing Omen back to a vertical base, before dropping him again with another dropkick. He proceeds to stomp away on the prone body of the Brooklyn native, before moving over towards a neutral corner. Cain climbs the turnbuckles, sitting on the top rope, patiently waiting as Omen begins to get back to his feet. As Omen turns around, Cain leaps out of the corner, crashing into him with a diving spear.
Darren: "Oh my God! I think he may have just broken Omen in half with that move."
Funnybone is reaching over the top rope towards Cain, begging for a tag. Cain gets back to his feet, looking over at his clown tag partner. Shrugging, Cain walks over and tags Funnybone in, who leaps over the top rope, full of energy dancing around and swinging his fists like he is a professional boxer. Funnybone runs to the ropes and as he comes back, jumps up with a somersault and lands a leg drop across the chest of Omen. Funnybone then makes the cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Funnybone is back to his feet, not worried about missing out on the pinfall. He waits as Omen slowly gets back to his feet, before moving in and landing a front dropkick to the chest of his opponent, taking Omen down to the mat once again. Once again, Funnybone makes the cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Johnno: "Why do you suppose that Funnybone thinks he has to keep trying to pin Omen?"
Darren: "Well you have to remember Tim, that Funnybone isn't that well trained as a wrestler. He obviously sees everyone else try it, so he figures he will too, I guess. But then you also gotta remember that Funnybone isn't all there upstairs, so who knows what he is really thinking.
Back in the ring, Funnybone has Omen back on his feet. He jumps up, wrapping his legs around Omen's head, looking for a hurricanrana, but Omen is able to block it and drive Funnybone into the mat with a powerbomb.
Darren: "And with the first bit of offense we have seen from Omen so far in this match, he has stopped Funnybone in his tracks and now Omen has the opportunity to follow up."
Omen brings Funnybone back up to his feet, before forcing Funnybone down into a standing head scissors. He takes hold of both of Funnybone's arm in a double underhook. Looking over at Sean Cain, Omen can be heard saying something.
Omen: "Tell Willett I said this is for him."
Omen lifts Funnybone up, looking for a tigerbomb, but Funnybone quickly reverses the move, taking Omen down with a hurricanrana. Funnybone looks over to Cain, before dragging himself, quite dramatically, over towards his corner. Cain looks down at Funnybone, shaking his head again. Funnybone smiles, getting back to his feet. He shrugs at his dramatic acting, before tagging in "The American Nightmare." Cain stands over the fallen Omen, before lifting him up to his feet.
Cain: "I'll tell him you said hi."
Cain pushes Omen back to the ropes, before whipping him to the other side of the ring. As Omen rebounds off, Colta is able to get the blind tag. Cain lifts Omen up, spins around and drives him into the mat with a spinning spinebuster. Cain makes the cover, but the ref doesn't count as Omen isn't the legal man. Getting back to his feet, Cain walks over to the ref, who explains what happened. Cain turns around and is met with a spinning heel kick from "The Hawaiian Hunter." As Cain goes down and Colta turns back around, his head is almost taken right off as Funnybone has climbed into the ring and levels him with a thrust kick to the head.
Johnno: "The Punchline!"
Funnybone drags Cain over and lays him across Colta, before bailing out of the ring. The referee makes the count.
1...
2...
kickout!
The crowd cheers as their adopted Aussie, Seth Colta, is able to kick out of the pinfall attempt. At this stage, Sean Cain has shaken off the affects of the spinning heel kick, getting back to his feet, bring Colta back up by the hair. Meanwhile, Funnybone has managed to drag Omen out of the ring, leaving him at ringside and getting back up on the apron in his respective corner. Cain locks in a full nelson on Colta, lifting him up and slamming him into the mat with a full nelson slam. The crowd boo loudly as Cain gloats over his strength. Dragging Colta back up to his feet, Cain shoves him into the neutral corner. Cain grabs hold of the middle rope on each side of his opponent, before driving a shoulder into the stomach of Colta. He does this twice more, before grabbing hold of Colta and whipping him to the opposite corner of the ring. Cain delays for a moment, before charging in and leaping through the air, crashing into Colta with a splash. As he lands though, Cain wraps his arms around Colta's waist and throws him out of the corner with a belly to belly suplex.
Darren: "Belly to belly suplex. Nightmare Special!"
Cain goes for a cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Darren: "Oh my God, Seth Colta kicked out."
Johnno: "Surely this guy has no idea what he's doing. Every time he kicks out, he's gonna piss off "The American Nightmare" more and more. I'm glad I'm not in his boots at the moment."
Cain gets back up to his feet, looking extremely frustrated. He looks around at the crowd.
Cain: "IT'S OVER!!"
Cain drags Colta back up to his feet, putting him into a reverse facelock. He lifts Colta up so he is across Cain's shoulder, before placing his hands under Colta's arms, lifting him up into a reverse crucifix position.
Darren: "He's got him up..."
Cain throws Colta up slightly and as he drops, catches him with a cutter, laying out "The Hawaiian Hunter" with the American Dream Killer!
Darren & Johnno: "American Dream Killer!"
Cain rolls Colta over onto his back and covers him.
1...
2...
NO!
Before the ref can count the three, Omen has managed to reach in and drag Cain off of Colta, pulling him out of the ring and onto the floor. Cain is back to his feet and he and Omen begin to brawl, with Omen getting a slight upper hand, having used the past few minutes to recover. Omen doubles Cain over with a boot to the gut, lifting him up and dropping "The American Nightmare" with a tigerbomb. As Omen gets back to his feet, Funnybone, in a surprise move, leaps from the apron and lands on Omen, spinning him around and driving him into the floor with a tornado DDT!
Darren: "Funnybone with a tornado DDT from the apron and now everyone is down!"
Johnno: "Everyone except Funnybone that is. What is he doing now?"
Funnybone is back to his feet. He manages to lift Sean Cain up and roll him into the ring. Funnybone climbs back up onto the apron and leaning over the top rope, he tags himself in.
Darren: "Funnybone has just tagged himself in. He may win this match yet."
Johnno: "At least he knows the rules."
Funnybone climbs into the ring and walks up to Seth Colta, who is slowly beginning to move again. Funnybone lifts him up to his feet, but Colta quickly fires off a couple of kicks. Funnybone manages to block a kick, before taking Colta down with a fireman's carry. As Colta gets back up, Funnybone nails a dropkick to the chest, knocking him back into the corner. Funnybone whips Colta into the opposite corner, before running in after him. Funnybone leaps up and lands on Colta, falling backwards and monkey flipping him out of the corner. Funnybone climbs up onto the turnbuckles, sitting on the top one. Seth Colta slowly gets back up to his feet, turning around and seeing Funnybone perched on the top rope. He charges in, but Funnybone stops him with a kick to the chest, before grabbing Colta by the head, pushing out of the corner and swinging around with another tornado DDT.
Darren: "Funnybone with a tornado DDT again and it definitely looks like he can win this match."
Funnybone jumps back up to his feet and looks around. Omen and Cain are only just moving on the outside of the ring. He drags Colta over towards the corner, before climbing the turnbuckles again. Funnybone looks over his shoulder, before leaping off the top rope, flipping over and crashing down on top of Seth Colta with a moonsault!
Johnno: "Moonsault!"
Funnybone hooks the leg as he covers Colta.
1...
2...
3!!
The crowd cheers as Funnybone gets back to his feet, arms raised in victory.
Becky: "Here are your winners, the team of Funnybone and "The American Nightmare" Sean Cain!
Funnybone dances around the ring as "Bedrock Anthem" plays from the speakers once again. Sean Cain has just managed to get back to his feet at ringside and can only look on in amazement as Funnybone has his hand raised by the referee. Funnybone climbs out of the ring, walking past Cain, but not before stopping and holding his hand up for a high five. Cain looks at him, a slightly disgusted look on his face, before shaking his head. Funnybone simply shrugs and walks off up the ramp, slapping the hands of the fans behind the security barrier, the sounds of "Weird" Al Yankovic still playing over the speakers. The camera cuts back to the announce table and the Outback Thunder announce team.
Darren: "And there goes one happy man, in the form of Funnybone. I gotta say Tim, I didn't think he'd be able to pull that off, getting the pinfall like that."
Johnno: "I think he managed to surprise everyone here tonight, including me as well."
Darren: "Indeed he has, Tim.
A graphic for "The Psycho" Bryan Willett versus "Mad Dog" Murphy comes up on the screen, showing the two men alongside one another in their fighting stances, as well as showing Dollar in the background.
Darren: "Up next, we will be having the first of our two main event matches of the night and it will be the leader of The Saints, "The Psycho" Bryan Willett going up against the Australian National Champion "Mad Dog" Murphy in a match where Dollar has picked the stipulation."
Johnno: "Again, you know when these matches are happening. I was under the impression we didn't know. I think this is totally unfair."
Darren: "And that, folks, is why I'm the play by play guy around here. Stick around everyone, as that match is up next."
The cameras cut to the ring, showing Seth Colta, who is slowly getting back up to his feet, before Outback Thunder cuts to a commercial.
As Outback Thunder comes back from the commercial break, we see The Saints backstage. Brian Hollywood, "The American Nightmare" Sean Cain and "The Psycho" Bryan Willett along with his valet/love interest Danielle LeCroix. Willett looks quite angry about something and we soon find out what it is as the audio comes on.
Willett: "What the hell happened out there!? It was a simple enough task for the both of you. Get the pinfall and show everyone how dominant The Saints can be! And what happened? Hollywood, you got cou..."
Before Willett can continue, Brian Hollywood cuts in.
Hollywood: "Yes, I got counted out, but I think you're forgetting, boss, that I managed to knock Matt Carter right the *bleep* out after the match. I think that shows how agressive we can actually be."
Willett, unhappy with Hollywood speaking out of turn, steps right up to him until they are nose to nose.
Willett: "Yes, you may have managed to destroy Matt Carter, but that in itself takes no real effort. You failed to do as I asked. You failed to pick up the victory."
Cain quickly steps in, trying to diffuse the situation.
Cain: "Hey, cut it out you two..."
Willett snaps around, now coming face to face with "The American Nightmare".
Willett: "Don't even get me started on you. You let a clown get the pinfall in your match."
Cain: "Hey, I got dropped out on the floor with a tigerbomb. I wasn't able to get up and moving by myself."
Willett: "Yeah, I saw that too. Not only did the clown get the pinfall, he also had to pick your ass up and put you in the ring so you didn't get counted out like Hollywood did. Sure, you may have a win marked against your name, but when people read into it a bit more, they're gonna see that Sean Cain, the great "American Nightmare" had to not only be helped into the ring by a clown, but he allowed that clown to get the pinfall in their match."
Cain: "Well it's not like I had a choice about being tagged with him anyway. It was a decision by the owner, for some *bleep* up reason."
By this time, the owner of EAW himself, Scott Carmichael, has walked past the foursome in the middle of their arguing.
Scott: "Seems that the three of you have some problems to work out. Well I suggest you keep an eye on that ring a bit later tonight, as I have a special surprise in store for The Saints."
Scott gives a smirk to the group, before walking off. Willett stares at the EAW owner as he walks off.
Willett: "I'm not sure what he has in mind for us, but I suggest we keep our eyes open for any tricks. You may also want to watch the ring right about now, as I'm gonna be putting on a school out there and showing you two how to win a match."
Danielle LeCroix takes Willett by the arm as the two of them walk off towards the Gorilla position. Hollywood and Cain look at each other, before walking off towards The Saints locker room. The camera cuts back to ringside, and more specifically the announce table and the announce team.
Darren: "Well it looks like there is some falling out amongst the ranks of The Saints and it seems that our boss, Scott Carmichael, might be going to take advantage of that situation with an announcement later tonight."
Johnno: "And while all that was going on backstage, look what happened out here!"
The camera switches to the ring, where a cage has been set up for the next match.
Johnno: "It looks to me that we have our stipulation for the Murphy-Willett match. Cage match! The first in EAW and who better to put in there than Bryan Willett and "Mad Dog" Murphy."
Darren: "Indeed you're right Tim. Now let's send things over to Becky James, who will announce the participants and give us a run down of the match rules."
"The Psycho" Bryan Willett
vs
Australian National Champion
John "Mad Dog" Murphy
Becky: "The following contest is a Lights Out Cage Match, where the first man to incapacitate their opponent for a ten-count will be the winner."
The lights in the arena dim to a blood red hue as we hear the voice of Billy Connoly speak in its accented voice, "O Lord, raise me to Thy right hand and count me amonst Thy Saints." before we hear the voice of Rev Theory's lead singer Rich Luzzi sing
**I hear voices in my head
They council me, they understand
They talk to me**
A golden spotlight shines down on the entry way as a highlight video package plays on the big screen while "Voices" kicks into full gear through the arena's sound system. Stepping through the curtain with fellow Saints member Danielle LeCroix by his side is Bryan Willett, better known as "The Psycho" wearing a black t-shirt with The Saints logo and black knee-length wrestling shorts. He also has a water bottle in his right hand.
Becky: Introducing from Anywhere But Here, he is accompanied to the ring by Saints member Danielle LeCroix. He stands six feet, two inches tall, and weighs in at two hundred and twenty-three pounds. Representing The Saints, he is "The Psycho" Bryan Willett!
As the two make their way arm-in-arm to the ring, the pair look disgustingly at the crowd yelling various obecenities at them.
**You got your rules and your religion All designed to keep your safe But when rules start getting broken You start questioning your faith I have a voice that is the savior It's alive and belongs to hate I have a voice that has the knowledge And the power to rule your fate**
With the pair reaching ringside, Willett walks up the ring steps leading to the cage door. Danielle stays on the floor, obviously wanting to stay out of potential harm's way. Seeing one fan at the ringside security barrier on his feet and mouthing off at Willett and LeCroix, Willett jumps down and walks over to the fan. The fan rips into Willett who simply stands there and smiles, taking it all in. A few seconds pass before Willett finally responds by spitting the water in a mist-like fashion into the face of the fan, revealing that Willett had already taken in a drink from his water bottle.
**I hear voices crying I see heroes dying I taste blood that's drying I feel tension rising**
Climbing back onto the ring steps, Willett enters the ring and steps through the top and middle rope. Selecting a nearby corner, Willett slumps down and rests his head on the middle turnbuckle. Danielle by this time, has walked over and is standing behind Willett outside the cage.
**I hear voices in my head They council me, they understand They talk to me They talk to me They tell me things that I will do They show me things I'll do to you They talk to me They talk to me**
Slowly, the music fades and we can really hear the crowd's displeasure over Willett being in the ring.
Johnno: "I don't think these people like Willett much."
Darren: "You think?! Just listen to them!"
Suddenly, a chant begins to rise up MAD DOG! MAD DOG! MAD DOG!
Johnno: "I think the crowd wants their hero."
Almost on cue, Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out For a Hero" begins to play. The crowd rises to their feet to greet the EAW Australian National Heavyweight Champion as green and gold spotlights circle the arena and a highlight video of the champion plays on the big screen. Stepping through the curtain with the Australian National Heavyweight title belt strapped around his waist, John "Mad Dog" Murphy looks out to the crowd with a confident smile on his face before setting his sights on the caged ring before him.
**Where have all the good men gone And where are all the gods? Where's the street-wise Hercules To fight the rising odds? Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed? Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need**
Darren: "And the champ is looking not at his opponent, but the cage."
Johnno: "This being the first cage match in Eastern Australian Wrestling - and a cage match with weapons at that - Mad Dog is best served to try and keep himself from getting too hurt in light of his upcoming title match against Dollar."
Illuminated by a white spotlight as the lights in the arena alternate from green to gold, Murphy walks towards the ring, trying to get a feel for the cage, as it encloses the ring.
Becky: "Introducing the opponent. Currently residing at the Brigade for Australian Strategy, Tactics And Regional Direction. He stands six-feet four inches and weighs in at two hundred and forty-nine pounds. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the EAW Australian National Heavyweight Champion, John "Mad Dog" Murphy!"
**I need a hero I'm holding out for at hero 'till the end of the night He's gotta be strong And he's gotta be fast And he's gotta be fresh from the fight**
Walking up the ring steps, Murphy unstraps the title belt and hands it to a ringside production worker, pulling up the strap on his white singlet before climbing into the caged ring. Senior Referee Frank James stands in the ring along with Willett who is still sitting in the corner, eying Murphy. Stepping through the rope, Murphy matches Willett's gaze. As the cage door closes, Willett grabs the top rope and pulls himself to his feet. Motioning to the timekeeper's table, James calls for the bell to be rung.
Darren: "And here we go."
Murphy walks to the center of the ring and extends his hand.
Murphy: "Shake my hand."
Willett looks at Murphy's outstretched right hand as he moves towards Murphy's position.
Murphy: "Shake my hand, Willett."
Willett's gaze goes from Murphy's outstretched hand to Murphy's eyes, and back to the hand. Slowly, Willett reaches his right hand out, only to swing his left hand connecting an open-handed slap to the face of the Australian National Heavyweight Champion.
Darren: "No respect from The Psycho."
Johnno: "You know he's a snake waiting to strike. Murphy should have known better than to try and expect Willett to show the champ the respect he's due."
As Murphy recoils from the slap, Willett charges at the champion only to be met by a right forearm to the face. The impact from the forearm causes Willett to leave his feet and land on his back. Murphy drops down to one knee over Willett and rains a succession of right hands.
Darren: "The champ is throwing bombs to Willett."
Johnno: "And all referee Frank James can do is stand there. His job is only to perform the ten-count to end the match!"
Murphy continues to rain down blows as Willett tries to cover up. Using his legs, Willett manages to use his martial arts training to grab hold of Murphy's downed knee and trip him up, allowing Willett to escape and roll to his feet. Murphy, having been tripped up, quickly jumps to his feet and takes up a fighting stance equal to Willett's.
Darren: "And we have a stand off of sorts."
Willett and Murphy waste no time in their afformentioned stand off as the two lock up. Neither man give any ground, and after a few more seconds, both men back away before locking up again. This time, Willett gets Murphy into a side headlock and pushes him into the ropes. Bouncing off the ropes, Murphy runs into Willett with a shoulder block and takes Willett down.
Darren: "The champ takes Willett down again."
Running against the ropes, Murphy leaps over Willett who had started to get up but dropped down. As Murphy bounces off the opposite set of ropes, Willett kips up to his feet and leapfrogs Murphy. On Murphy's third bounce off the ropes, Willett grabs hold of Murphy's arm and attempts to execute an arm drag, but finds it blocked.
Darren: "Murphy with the reversal, no!"
Murphy attempts an arm drag of his own, but has that blocked. Instead of attempting another arm drag, Willett jumps up and catches Mad Dog in a head scissors takedown.
Darren: "Head scissors by The Psycho."
Willett rolls to his feet and turns to the crowd posing in a Jesus Christ-like pose.
Willett: (in a high pitched voice mocking Bonnie Tyler) "I'm holding out for a hero."
Johnno: "A little showboating from Bryan Willett, and he doesn't realize that the champ is on his feet?"
True to fact, John "Mad Dog" Murphy completely rolled through the head scissors, and ended up on his feet. Allowing Willett to get his little showboat off, he patiently waits for Willett to turn around. As Willett does turn around, "Mad Dog" Murphy lands a stiff open-handed slap with his right hand that causes Willett to simply drop from the force.
Darren: "You can hear that in the rafters, mate!"
Johnno: "I think Willett's going to need dental sugery after that one."
Murphy: "How does that feel, you son of a bitch?"
Rubbing his jaw from a seated position, Willett looks up at Murphy who motions for Willett to bring it on. Swinging around on his knee, Willett pops up to his feet and quickly into a collar-and-elbow tie-up with Murphy. After being tied up for a couple of seconds, Willett breaks free and switches to a go-behind where he picks Murphy up and drops him in stomach down on the mat.
Darren: "Willett with some basic catch-as catch-can wrestling."
Johnno: "Interesting to see this, especially since this is a no-rules cage match where one has to knock his opponent out."
As Willett rides Murphy, he slaps the back of the Australian National Champion's head five times before getting up and backing away. Willett turns to the crowd once again and points to Murphy.
Willett: "There's your champion, Australia. Out-wrestled by a Canadian, no less."
Pushing himself to his feet, Murphy takes a run at Willett. Willett turns around in time to side step the champ and send him shoulder-first into the corner. However, with the ring enclosed by the cage, rather than his shoulder impact against the ring post, Murphy instead goes head-first into the cage meshing. Willett sees this as an opportunity to attack and lays in some stomps to the lower back of the champion.
Darren: "Willett is finally getting a chance to deliver some damage to the champion after a slow start."
On the outside of the cage, Danielle LeCroix is cheering on Willett's actions. Meanwhile, Willett continues to lay in some stomps before pulling Murphy away from where he speared the cage wall. Whipping Murphy towards the far ropes, Willett runs ahead of Mad Dog and leaps onto the second rope. Twisting in mid-air, Willett lands a tornado kick to the back of Murphy's head causing him to simply drop to the mat.
Danielle: "He just kicked your fucking head off!"
Johnno: "I don't think that could have been phrased any better."
As Danielle gets a bit of heat for yelling out her comment, Willett motions for the referee to begin counting while he paces the ring.
James: "One!"
Looking at Murphy, Willett doesn't take his focus off his opponent.
James: "Two!"
Willett: "Stay down, you Australian piece of shit. The suffering will only continue unless you stay down."
James: "Three!"
Murphy begins to stir and shakes his head to try and clear the cobwebs.
James: "Four!"
Noticing that he's near the ropes, Murphy begins to crawl towards them. Grasping the middle rope, Murphy pulls himself to his knees in time to see Willett come off the ropes and land a drop kick flush to the face.
Darren: "My Lord, Murphy didn't get his hands up in time to block the dropkick!"
As the camera is able to get a better shot at Murphy, we can see blood coming from his nose. Bringing his hand to his nose, Mad Dog wipes some of the blood onto his hand and stares at it for a moment. Almost as if a light switch went off in Mad Dog's head, he begins to seeth with his breathing becoming heavy and almost like a hiss.
Johnno: "And the champ is bleeding from the nose!"
Walking over to Murphy, Willett tries to throw a kick to the face, but his eyes go wide as he finds himself with his foot caught by Murphy. Yanking hard, Murphy causes Willett to drop while the champion locks in a modified single leg grapevine.
Darren: "Murphy's going for a submission hold!"
Johnno: "He's got to know that the match can't end in a tap out."
Darren: "Maybe not, but that doesn't stop Mad Dog from taking away one of Willett's weapons, and that being his feet. At the same time, it gives Murphy a chance to clear his head from the blows he's received to it."
As John Murphy continues to stretch on the right leg of Bryan Willett, you can see he's grasping at the heel, twisting it slightly into a modified heel hook causing Willett to scream in pain. Slowly, a rise from the crowd brings a familiar chant.
Crowd: "Mad Dog! Mad Dog! Mad Dog! Mad Dog!"
From outside the cage, Danielle LeCroix can be heard yelling in response to the chant.
Danielle: "Shut up you stupid kangaroo lovers!"
After several moments of having the modified heel hook in place, John Murphy, with blood slowly dripping onto his upper lip, lets go and rolls to his feet. In a fit of pain, Willett grabs his leg and lets out another cry of pain, apparent that the submission hold did some damage.
James: "One!"
Darren: "And the count's begun on Willett. While he's on the ground trying to get feeling back into his leg, he's vulnerable to the count!"
James: "Two!"
Rolling towards the ring ropes, Willett finds himself near the baseball bat, one of two weapons placed inside the cage for use by either the champion, or The Psycho. Murphy, meanwhile, has set his sights on the other weapon in the ring, a 2x4 board wrapped in several layers of barbed wire. Grabbing the bat, Willett uses it to help prop him up to his feet.
Darren: "I think both Murphy and Willett have bad intentions on the mind, right now."
As both men run at each other (Willett with more of a limp), they both swing, but only one man is able to connect, and that ends up being John "Mad Dog" Murphy, striking the barbed wire cleanly on the left arm of Bryan Willett, who had been going for a butt shot with the end of the bat to Murphy's face. The blow causes Willett to drop the bat, and for bits of flesh to be torn away as Murphy brings the barbed-wire 2x4 back to a ready position.
Johnno: "And now Willett's bleeding!"
With Willett grabbing his arm, he leaves himself wide open for another blow, this time to the side of the head, causing Willett to crumple to the mat.
Darren: "Oh my God! John Murphy just nearly decapitated Bryan Willett's head with that shot!"
Willett is lying face down on the mat in a prone position. The only movement coming from the short, shallow breaths he's taking.
James: "One!"
Still no movement from Willett. John Murphy holds the barbed wire 2x4 at his side, looking at Willett as Danielle screams from outside the cage for Willett to get up.
James: "Two!"
Without warning, the opening beats to "History Song" by The Good, The Bad and The Queen begin to play as Dollar, dressed in his "street clothes" that consist of his faded and torn white pants and old black vest, walks towards the ring having stepped through the curtain.
James: "Three!"
Darren: "What the hell?!"
Johnno: "It's Dollar! He's probably coming to see how the match he chose for Mad Dog is fairing."
Darren: "He's got no right to be here."
James: "Four!"
Willett still isn't moving in the ring as Dollar now reaches ringside and looks at the referee standing outside the cage, near the cage door. Moving closer to the referee, it's clear that without speaking a word, Dollar wants the referee to get out of the way. The referee complies, dashing over to the timekeeper's table.
James: "Five!"
Darren: "What is Dollar thinking?"
Dollar looks up at the cage door and places his fingers through the mesh. Seeing this, Murphy takes the barbed wire 2x4 and swings it near Dollar's hands. The impact of the 2x4 hitting the cage does nothing to deter Dollar as with a huge tug, Dollar tries to pull the cage door off its hinges. His first try is unsuccessful, mainly because Dollar simply tried to pull it off and didn't put his back into it to give him more leverage.
James: "Six!"
Darren: "You have got to be kidding me, mate!"
Johnno: "I kid you not, Darren. Dollar is trying to rip the cage door off!"
Meanwhile, Willett is slowly beginning to stir. Blood is pouring down from the side of his face, and has caused a fair sized puddle to be smeared into the ring canvass. Slowly, Willett begins to crawl towards the nearest set of ring ropes.
James: "Seven!"
Bracing himself for another attempt, Dollar tugs on the door once more, this time causing it to break off its hinges to the amazement of the crowd. Tossing the door aside, Dollar enters the cage and stands three feet away from John Murphy. Willett, meanwhile has positioned himself on one knee, effectively breaking the count. Blood continues to pour down Willett's face as he looks at both Dollar and Murphy through a crimson mask.
Darren: "Murphy's taking a swing with the 2x4!"
Johnno: "Jesus Christ!"
As Murphy takes a wild two-handed swing with the barbed wire 2x4, Dollar unleashes a powerful thrust kick to the jaw of the Australian National Champion.
Darren: "Top Dollar!"
Murphy falls back like a giant red wood tree would in a forest with the impact of the Top Dollar. Dollar turns his head just in time to see a bloody Bryan Willett rush towards the man who set up this match. Only problem is, Dollar was ready and dealt Willett the same fate that had just befallen John Murphy.
Darren: "Another Top Dollar, this time to Willett! This was all just a set-up by Dollar to not only eliminate a possible top contender, but the champion himself!"
Johnno: "And now he's leaving the ring. There's nothing referee Frank James can do except count!"
James: "One!"
Outside the ring, Danielle LeCroix is once again screaming for Willett to get up.
James: "Two!"
Darren: "Neither man is moving!"
Johnno: "And Dollar looks on from the ramp satisfied with what he's done."
James: "Three!"
Darren: "Dollar should be suspended for what he's done, tonight."
Johnno: "I have to agree with you, Darren. Dollar's acts tonight make me want to go even further and have him removed from EAW completely."
James: "Four!"
Danielle: "Get up! Come on, Bryan, get up!"
James: "Five!"
Crowd: "Let's Go Mad Dog! *clap, clap, clap-clap-clap* Let's Go Mad Dog! *clap, clap, clap-clap-clap*"
James: "Six!"
Darren: "You can't be serious."
Both Willett and Murphy begin to move.
James: "Seven!"
Willett rolls onto his stomach slowly while Murphy raises his arm and tries to roll over.
James: "Eight!"
Pushing himself up to his knees, Willett looks at Murphy while reaching for the fallen baseball bat.
James: "Nine!"
Time seems to slow down as Willett launches at Murphy with the baseball bat hoping to strike the Champion while he's down. However, with an amazing feet of strength and heart, Murphy kips up to his feet and catches Willett and catches him in a devastating facebreaker DDT.
Darren: "The Boganator! How did Mad Dog get the strength to pull that off?!"
The force of the move known as The Boganator causes both Murphy and Willett to land on the canvas hard. Hard enough for Murphy that while able to pull off the move, he wasn't completely coherant as he dropped himself back a little too far and his head bounced off the canvas.
James: "One!"
Darren: "Both men are down again, and from what I can tell, the lights are on for both men, but nobody's home."
James: "Two!"
Johnno: "I don't know if I've ever seen such a display of heart from the champion. John "Mad Dog" Murphy exemplifies what it means to be a champion."
James: "Three!"
Darren: "The same could be said about Bryan Willett. He wasn't expecting Dollar to come out here, but despite all this, we've seen that he can take a great deal of punishment and not back down."
James: "Four!"
There is still no movement from either man, and the pool of blood continues to grow around Willett's head from the open wound that still hasn't dried up.
James: "Five!"
Danielle: "Come on, Bryan! Get up! You can win this if you get up!"
James: "Six!"
Darren: "Mad Dog is starting to move!"
Slowly moving his fingers to ensure he has circulation, John Murphy's eyes begin to blink a little more rapidly as if he's coming back to a state of consiousness.
James: "Seven!"
Johnno: "Now Willett's starting to move, incredible!"
Having gone face first into the canvass, Willett was already on his stomach, which put him in a better position to get up and break the count.
James: "Eight!"
Danielle: "Come on! You can do it!"
James: "Nine!"
Pushing up with his arms, Willett tries to find a placing for his knee, but all the blood surrounding Willett's position causes his hand to slip and he falls back into the canvass. Murphy, meanwhile has rolled to his stomach and is doing the same thing, but this time gets to a knee. However, he has no equilibrium to speak of, causing him to collapse back down to the canvass.
James: "Ten! Ring the bell!"
The bell sounds and the crowd begins to boo at the finish of the match, not happy about the fact that there wasn't a winner. Walking over to the exposed cage entrance, Frank James issues his ruling to Becky, the ring announcer. After a couple of seconds, Becky nods, takes a step back and raises the microphone to her lips.
Becky: "Ladies and gentlemen, referee Frank James has stated that due to the fact neither man could answer the ten-count, this match is declared a draw."
The crowd's booing gets even louder as some of them begin to throw their drinks and garbage towards the ring.
Crowd: "Bullshit! Bullshit! Bullshit!"
Darren: "I don't like this any more than the crowd!"
Johnno: "I think they might riot!"
Darren: "We'll be back after these messages where at that time, we hope the situation here at ringside will be resolved.
The cameras fade out on the trainers running down to the ring and sliding into the ring to tend to both men as the ring crew work at tearing down the cage.
We fade in on a shot of the broadcast table where Darren and Johnno are sitting.
Darren: "Welcome back to Outback Thunder, and during the commercial break, both John "Mad Dog" Murphy, the Australian National Champion and "The Psycho" Bryan Willett were brought backstage on stretchers, after the brutal ending to their cage match."
Johnno: "The situation wasn't helped much by Dollar, who made his presence know, delivering the Top Dollar to both men after ripping the cage door right off its set place!"
Darren: "We hope to have an update on both men before the end of the show tonight. In the meantime, we still have plenty of action.
The camera cuts to the office of Scott Carmichael, who is seated behind the large wooden desk. Upon seeing the camera come on, Scott gets to his feet and addresses the fans, and more specifically The Saints, in what appears to be a segment taped during the last match.
Scott: "Bryan Willett, Brian Hollywood and Sean Cain. After seeing your argument just a few moments ago and seeing that at the moment, you three are having trouble getting along, I've decided to make a few matches for the next Outback Thunder show. Using an idea popularised by the American baseball leagues among other sports, I've decided to enter the three of you into a Round Robin Challenge. On the next Outback Thunder show, the fans will see "The American Nightmare" Sean Cain take on Brian Hollywood. Then, they will see Hollywood face off against "The Psycho" Bryan Willett and in the main event, Sean Cain and Bryan Willett will face off. Whoever picks up the most victories can call themselves the best of The Saints. Oh, and whoever wins the challenge, their is a special little surprise for them. Good luck, gentlemen."
The camera cuts back to the announce position, where Darren and Tim are seated.
Johnno: "A round robin challenge? Involving all three Saints members? I tell you what Darren, our boss never ceases to surprise me."
Darren: "Me neither Tim. But you've got to wonder if Willett will be fine for the challenge after the cage match we just witnessed."
Johnno: "It's two weeks away, Darren. I'm sure Willett will be good and ready by then."
Darren: "Well I suppose only time will tell. Let's head back to the ring, where our next match is about to start."
Schmied
vs
Chris Deppe
vs
Chris Deppe
Becky: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first...
[The buildup for "Ruff Ryder's Anthem" by DMX begins to play over the loudspeaker.]
Uh!
[The single chord of the synthesized music continues to play still with no activity.]
Someting new!
[There is an explosion at the top of the ramp Chris Deppe comes out from the back looking cool and calm and he starts to mouth along with the words.]
Stop!
Drop!
Shut em down
Open up shop
Oh
No
Thats how ruff ryders roll!
[Chris nods his head as he beats on his chest as he makes his way down to the ring still mouthing the words to the song.]
Becky: "From Memphis, TN. Weighing in at two hundred and sixty four pounds..."
Bustas wanna try, bustas wanna lie
Then bustas wonder why, bustasz wanna die
All I know is pain all I feel is rain
How can I maintain, with mad stuff on my brain
I resort to violence, my homies move in silence
Like you dont know what are style is
Memphis brothas the wildest
My homies is wit it
You want it? come and get it
Took it then we split it
You dang right we did it
What the in the world you gonna do
When we run up on you
Messin wit the wrong crew
Dont know what we goin thru
Ima have ta show bustas
How easily we blow bustas
When you find out theres somemore bustas
Thats runnin with your bustas
Nothin we cant handle
Break it up and dismantle
Light it up like a candle
Just cause I cant stand you
Put my stuff on tapes
Like you bussin grapes
Think you holdin weight?
Then you havent met the apes
[Chris climbs the stairs and climbs into the ring turning to the crowd.]
Becky: "Representing the Ruff Ryders...Chris Deppe!"
Stop!
Drop!
Shut em down
Open up shop
Oh
No
Thats how ruff ryders roll!
[As his music dies off, Chris watches the ramp, waiting for his opponent.]
Becky: "And the opponent..."
The lights shut off completely in the arena for a few seconds. As the crowd begins to look around we hear the shrilling opening chord of Rammstein's Meil Teil play over the arena. After the drums beat in the background; red lights flicker on and off and smoke begins to fill the arena as Schmied, who has a chain mail vest and black hooded coat on, enters.
"Denn du bist was du isst
und ihr wisst was es ist
Es ist mein Teil – nein
Mein Teil – nein
Da das ist mein Teil – nein
Mein Teil – nein"
Becky: "From Berlin Germany and weighing in at two hundred and ninety five pounds..."
After Schmied passes through the smoke he kneels towards the ground slowly. After he reaches the floor he pounds it roughly and quickly rises, extends his arms out and pounds his chest before spitting "blood" into the air.
"Heute treff' ich einen Herrn
Der hat mich zum Fressen gern
Weiche Teile und auch harte
stehen auf der Speisekarte"
Schmied sadistically smiles and blood runs down his chest for a few seconds. After he's finished allowing blood from his mouth to trickle down; he runs towards the ring and slides into the ring. He pulls off his chain mail vest and hooded jacket, throws them to the ground and climbs the turnbuckle.
Becky: "This is...Schmied!"
"Es ist mein Teil – nein
Mein Teil – nein
Da das ist mein Teil – nein
Mein Teil – nein"
He looks up towards the sky and puts his hands together in a diamond shape into the sky, before separating them and drawing a diamond in mid air. He then climbs down from the turnbuckle and glares a hole through his opponent.
Chris Deppe and Schmied step up to each other as the referee calls for the bell. Both men begin to mouth off to each other, foreheads pressed against each other, neither of them backing down.
Johnno: "Look at these two, both of them running their mouths to each other. Both of them are just as fired up as the other."
Darren: "Well from what I have read on these two, Chris Deppe is a former gang member and wouldn't take any attitude from an opponent and Schmied apparently hates everyone, so I reckon this match is going to be explosive."
The war of words continues in the ring, until Schmied lashes out with a stiff right hand. Deppe's head snaps around, before he turns back to face the masked man. Smirking, Deppe fires off a right hand of his own. Schmied turns back again to face Deppe and again nails a right hand to Deppe. Soon, the match has broken out into a full on brawl, both men hammering the other with rights and lefts. Deppe soon gets the upper hand, firing off a number of hard right hands, rocking the big German backwards, before leaping up and taking Schmied off his feet with a dropkick to the chest. Deppe makes the cover.
1...
kickout!
Johnno: "Less than a minute into the match and Chris Deppe is trying for a pinfall already? Surely he must have known that wouldn't work."
Deppe brings Schmied back up to his feet, driving the knee into the midsection a couple of times, before whipping him to the ropes and taking Schmied to the mat with a drop toe hold. Moving quickly, Chris Deppe grabs Schmied's arm and locks in an armbar, looking for a submission win.
Darren: "For a big guy, Chris Deppe moves pretty quick. Only a couple of minutes in, he's managed to take Schmied down twice now and he's now got an armbar submission locked in."
Rather than keep the hold locked in for too long, Deppe releases the arm and gets back to his feet. He backs away from Schmied and as the masked German gets back to his feet, Deppe takes a few quick steps forward, before jumping up with an axe kick to the back of the neck. Deppe rolls Schmied over and makes the cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Darren: "Another attempted pinfall and another kick out by the big German monster."
Johnno: "I tell you what Darren, this Schmied is a scary lookin' fella. That whole blood spitting thing during his entrance really had me freaked out."
Dragging Schmied back to his feet again, Deppe whips the slightly larger man to the ropes, before catching him with a powerslam, once again putting Schmied on the mat. Rather than try for another cover though, this time Deppe is back to his feet, standing next to Schmied, before jumping up with a leg drop across the neck of his opponent. Deppe gets back up and drops another leg down across the throat of Schmied, before making the cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Johnno: "Why do you think Chris Deppe insists on trying to repeatedly pin Schmied? Surely it will just piss him off? I don't think that could be good for anyone facing him?"
Darren: "I think you might be right there Tim. But I've also read in Schmied's bio that his emotions can get the better of him and his rage can be more hindrance than a help."
Deppe brings Schmied back to his feet, but is suddenly stopped short when Schmied fires off a shot to the midsection. Schmied takes advantage of this delay, landing a few more stiff shots to the body of Chris Deppe, before grabbing him in a front facelock and lifting Deppe up with a suplex. Schmied holds Deppe upright for a moment, before bringing him crashing down to the mat with the suplex. Getting back up to his feet, Schmied yells out to the crowd, who boo loudly in return. Turning back to his opponent, Schmied begins to stomp the hell out of him until the referee steps in and tells Schmied to back off, who doesn't take too kindly to the interruption.
Darren: "And Schmied now bearing down on the referee, who wisely backs off, not wanting to be on the wrong end of a Schmied attack."
As Schmied turns back around, he is met with a shuffle side kick, taking him off his feet. Chris Deppe stands over his opponent, yelling at him to get back up.
Darren: "Chris Deppe with a shuffle side kick, near taking Schmied's head off, and listen to this crowd."
The crowd is cheering loudly as Deppe takes a few steps back, crouching down in a gridiron type stance. He waits patiently as Schmied slowly gets back to his feet. Deppe suddenly springs forward as Schmied turns around, taking the big man down with a spear!
Johnno: "Spear! 4th and 1! He definitely knocked the wind out of Schmied with that one."
Chris Deppe quickly makes the cover.
1...
2...
kickout!
Darren: "Kick out by Schmied and this match continues!"
Chris Deppe gets back up to his feet, slightly frustrated that he couldn't get the pinfall. He looks out to the crowd as they cheer loudly.
Deppe: "Time to finish this!"
Schmied slowly gets back to his feet as Chris Deppe stalks him, staying out of his line of sight. As Schmied turns back around, Deppe quickly drives a boot into his stomach before grabbing Schmied's head & jaw and dropping down hard to a seated position causing his head to snap back upon landing on Deppe's shoulder.
Darren & Johnno: "Inglewood Jack!"
Deppe stands over Schmied, yelling in his face and degrading him, before making the cover.
1...
2...
3!!
The sounds of "Ruff Ryder's Anthem" blasts from the speakers once again as Chris Deppe has his hand raised in victory.
Becky: "Here is your winner...Chris Deppe!"
Deppe stands on the middle turnbuckle, arms raised in victory, as DMX continues to play in the background. He jumps down from the corner, walking over to Schmied and mouthing off to him some more, before climbing out of the ring and down to the floor. Deppe continues to celebrate his win as the camera cuts back to the announce table.
Darren: "Chris Deppe with a pinfall victory over Schmied in a match that seemed very one sided most of the way through, don't you think so Tim?"
Johnno: "Yes, I do believe so Darren. It seems that Schmied was barely able to mount any offense at all during that match."
Darren: "Well, with that said, we are almost at the end of the evening. There is only one match left, and that is Dollar facing off against Chris Deppe's tag team partner, Shawn Kelley."
Johnno: "Yeah, and after what happened in the cage match, I'm sure both "Mad Dog" Murphy and Bryan Willett are looking for revenge against the big man from East Africa."
Darren: "Let's take a quick look at what happened earlier tonight in a truly brutal match."
A recap video begins to play, showing some highlights from the cage match. "Mad Dog" Murphy going head first into the cage. Murphy slamming the barbed wire 2x4 into the side of Bryan Willett's head. The announce team can be heard speaking over the top of the video.
Darren: "It was a match where a lot of blood happened to be spilt, with the champion almost taking Willett's head off with that barbed wire wrapped piece of wood."
Johnno: "Yeah, but that wasn't the biggest impact in the match."
Darren: "Indeed it wasn't Tim, as Dollar, the man who decided the stipulation for the match, soon showed up and he wasn't there simply to watch the match."
The video shows Dollar proceeding to rip the cage door off, but not before Murphy swung the barbed wire weapon at the door, trying to deter Dollar from entering the ring.
Johnno: "After that amazing feat of strength, ripping the cage door off like that, Dollar soon got involved in the match."
The video continues, showing Murphy taking a swing with the barbed wire weapon, but getting taken off his feet with a thrust kick by Dollar. Then Willett is shown charging towards Dollar, who takes him down with the same "Top Dollar" thrust kick.
Darren: "Even after Dollar's attack, somehow both men managed to continue the match, but only just."
The video shows Willett with the baseball bat, launching himself at the champion, who is able to kip up and catch Willett with a facebreaker DDT.
Johnno: "Yeah, but in an amazing effort, Murphy managed to catch Willett with The Boganator in a definite jump-out-of-your-seat moment. It was incredible."
Darren: "Indeed it was Tim. But in the end, the match was ruled a draw with neither man able to answer the ten count."
The video comes to an end, the camera back on the announce position.
Darren: "I can't help but think if Dollar hadn't involved himself in the match, we would have had a clear cut winner in the cage tonight. How exactly this will affect tonight's match is beyond me, but like you said Tim, I'm sure both Willett and the champ will be looking for revenge."
Johnno: "Exactly. And we still aren't sure what the stipulation for Dollar's match is, but by the looks of things out here, it's going to be nasty. Is that barbed wire they are wrapping around the ring ropes?"
Darren: "Indeed it is Tim. The main event is next. Don't go anywhere, we'll be back after this."
The camera cuts to a shot of the ring, where ring technicians are wrapping barbed wire around the ropes, before Outback Thunder cuts to a commercial.
Another Santi-no-show
As Outback Thunder comes back from the break, we cut backstage, where Dollar is making final preparations for his match with one half of the Ruff Ryders, taping his wrists as manager Irving Ruddy issues some last words, urging caution from the Malawian revelation. Their routine is interrupted by an unannounced entry by Becky James, the EAW ring announcer, her stunning brown eyes rendering Ruddy wordless as he whirls round, seemingly to admonish the incursion.
Becky: "Hi, I –"
She is shaky as she looks at Dollar, whose short history in EAW has contained no small amount of intimidating the ring announcer. Becky now clearly opts to exclusively address Ruddy.
Becky: "I was sent to get some words on Santino Romano. Irving, your client has ridiculed Romano's medical status, but Romano has called on a policeman named Jack Smith to legitimate his story."
Ruddy smiles.
Ruddy: "Sure, Becky. Jack Smith. Because that doesn't sound like a name that someone desperately made up on the spot at all."
Becky also smiles, issuing a nervous laugh.
Becky: "But don't you think it's a bit unneeded to make such comments? I'm told Scott Carmichael isn't too pleased about the credibility of one of his top competitors being undermined."
Dollar raises his eyebrows in the background, but goes on ignoring the exchange, now lacing his boots. Ruddy, for his part, sends his eyes to the ceiling in mock indignation.
Ruddy: "With all due respect Becky, the day Santino Romano is a top dog in EAW is the day we go back to the Brits begging to be colonised again. He's all mouth, seriously. He's sitting at home stuffing his face most likely, watching this on TV and congratulating himself for being so clever as to invent an injury on an entire different continent so that Carmichael isn't going to even have the resources to check on it. It's bullshit Becky."
Becky: "So do you expect Romano to be back on EAW TV soon?"
Ruddy: "Either way he loses Becky. He can stay away and watch his credibility fall away as I continue to respond to any and all further questions by convincing more and more of the public how moronically he's acted. Or he can show up on Thunder and get a beating so bad he'll wish he got shot down for real. Romano, if you're out there tonight, show up here and get your arse kicked. I dare you. Or if you're still kicking up your feet in the USA, wake up and save your career, get back to Australia for the next show, and take on Dollar like a man."
Becky: "Like a man? But really, has, er, has anyone taken on Dollar like a man yet?"
She shoots a nervous glance at Dollar, who chuckles softly. Ruddy replies.
Ruddy: "No man is a match for Dollar, Becky. My client is more than a man, he's a monster, and a burden for all in his way. Now if you'll excuse us -"
Dollar stands up and readies himself, flexing his shoulders and neck.
Ruddy: "My client has a beatdown to deliver! I hope Mad Dog chose wisely!"
Becky: "But one more thing. What do you have to say about Dollar's attack on John Murphy and Bryan Willett?"
Ruddy: "No comment. This interview's over."
The camera cuts back to ringside and the announce position.
Darren: "Strong words from Irving Ruddy regarding "The Sicilian Assassin" Santino Romano."
Johnno: "Yeah. But no comment about what happened in the cage match earlier? If you ask me, those two need to stop focusing on Romano and worry about the match tonight and Dollar should also watch out in case Murphy or Willett try and get some revenge."
Darren: "Can't help but agree there Tim. It's time now for our final match of the evening, and it's looking pretty vicious from this angle. Just before we shoot on over to Becky James for the introductions, we managed to catch up with "Mad Dog" Murphy earlier in the evening to explain to us his choice of match for Dollar and Shawn Kelley."
A video begins to play, showing the EAW Australian National Champion on screen.
Murphy: "G'day Newcastle. Now you're all probably wondering what match I have in store for Shawn Kelley and Dollar. Well I like to call it the Detention Centre Match. I called it that, because it is pretty much going to simulate the detention centres where all the illegal immigrants get put in when they try to enter Australia. This match will be all about helping out our own countrymen before helping Dollar out."
Murphy gives a wicked grin to the camera.
Murphy: "Like all those that cried foul in a detention centre when we ever did something to try and help, they'd try and put the blame on us, so the match will be No DQ. Detention Centres are fairly well guarded so to simulate that we'll wrap the ring ropes with barb wire. The detainees also go on their hunger strikes by sewing their mouths shut. Unfortunately, the boss didn't like that idea in the match, so instead we're going with duct tape across the mouth instead."
Murphy seems somewhat disappointed with that decision, but continues on.
Murphy: "And those illegal immigrants tend to abuse themselves a fair bit, so any non-explosive hardcore weapon is fair game. To win this match, you must tape your opponent's mouth shut and since it is still a wrestling match, you must pin them. And to finish it all off, just like when those detainees take off on us, even though we are trying to help them and we have to put them through the whole process again, we're gonna simulate that by making this match two out of three falls."
Murphy gives another wicked grin to the camera.
Murphy: "Enjoy this Dollar, because I know I will be."
The video ends as we come back to the announce position again.
Johnno: "This match is sounding pretty cool. I can't wait! Take it away, Becky!"
Dollar
vs
Shawn Kelley
Becky: "The following is a Detention Centre match."
Becky: "It will be contested under no DQ rules and to win, you must be able to pin your opponent twice, but not before taping their mouth shut with duct tape."
Johnno: (laughs) "Great!"
Becky: "Introducing first..."
[The buildup for "Ruff Ryder's Anthem" by DMX begins to play over the loudspeaker.]
Uh!
[The single chord of the synthesized music continues to play still with no activity.]
Someting new!
[There is an explosion at the top of the ramp and Shawn Kelley explodes onto the scene. He looks at the crowd and he nods his head along with the beat mouthing and motioning along with the words of the song.]
Stop!
Drop!
Shut em down
Open up shop
Oh
No
Thats how ruff ryders roll!
[Shawn nods his head as he beats on his chest as he makes his way down to the ring still mouthing the words to the song.]
Becky: "He stands six feet and four inches tall and weighs in tonight at two hundred and fifty five pounds..."
Bustas wanna try, bustas wanna lie
Then bustas wonder why, bustasz wanna die
All I know is pain all I feel is rain
How can I maintain, with mad stuff on my brain
I resort to violence, my homies move in silence
Like you dont know what are style is
Memphis brothas the wildest
My homies is wit it
You want it? come and get it
Took it then we split it
You dang right we did it
What the in the world you gonna do
When we run up on you
Messin wit the wrong crew
Dont know what we goin thru
Ima have ta show bustas
How easily we blow bustas
When you find out theres somemore bustas
Thats runnin with your bustas
Nothin we cant handle
Break it up and dismantle
Light it up like a candle
Just cause I cant stand you
Put my stuff on tapes
Like you bussin grapes
Think you holdin weight?
Then you havent met the apes
[Shawn walks up the ring steps and carefully climbs into the ring, trying to avoid the barbed wire, before turning to the crowd once again mouthing and motioning with the chorus.]
Becky: "Hailing from Memphis, TN..."
Stop!
Drop!
Shut em down
Open up shop
Oh
No
Thats how ruff ryders roll!
Becky:: "Representing the Ruff Ryders...he is Shawn Kelley!"
[Shawn nods his head with his "I'm better than you" smile on his face as he lifts his arm and kisses his biceps as the music ends.]
The Good, The Bad and The Queen's "History Song" rolls out of the speakers as the fans rise to hail the arrival of "White Man's Burden" Dollar. A cloud forms around the entrance way, making the brown lighting even more eerie.
Becky: "And the opponent...
The mysterious Dollar emerges through the dry ice, the smaller Irving Ruddy at his side. The man from Malawi paces slowly and confidently down the ramp, looking out defiantly at the fans who are making plenty of noise, although for the most part they still aren't sure whether to cheer or boo him.
Becky: "From Chiradzulu, Malawi and Weighing in at three hundred and twelve pounds..."
Dollar lumbers into the ring, also avoiding the barbed wire as much as possible.
Becky: "This is...Dollar!"
The lights snap back on to show Dollar reaching up to the sky with one arm from his perch on the second turnbuckle. Irving Ruddy has taken place at ringside, standing back slightly from the ring so as to not come in contact with the barbed wire. As Dollar climbs back down from the turnbuckle, he and Shawn Kelley both step into the centre of the ring and in a scene similar to the Schmied/Deppe match, they come face to face, foreheads pressed together as both men mouth off to each other. The referee calls for the bell to begin the match, and fists begin to fly all over the place.
Darren: "There's the bell and look at these two giants go, hammering each other with lefts and rights."
Dollar manages to rock the former gang member with a few stiff hands, before taking Kelley down with a forearm shot to the head.
Darren: "Dollar with the first knock down of the match and listen to Ruddy shouting orders from ringside."
Ruddy: "A weapon, Dollar. Grab a weapon. The chair, grab the chair."
Dollar looks around and sees the chair that his manager was pointing out to him. Dollar moves over to grab the chair, but is taken off his feet by Kelley, who chop blocks the back of the knee, before coming down on top of Dollar and raining down lefts and rights to the face of the Malawian monster. Dollar covers up as much as he can, before letting loose with a headbutt to Kelley, knocking him off of Dollar. The bigger man gets back to his feet, before dragging Kelley back to his. Dollar's progress is stopped short by a shot to the midsection from Kelley, who then picks Dollar up with a scoop slam, dropping him straight onto the chair that he was about to grab hold of moments ago.
Darren: "Shawn Kelley now with the offense, dropping Dollar onto that chair and now Kelley is looking for a weapon."
Johnno: "He should know all about using weapons, being a former gang member."
Darren: "Are you deliberately trying to get us into trouble?"
Kelley picks up a baseball bat from nearby. He takes a few practice swings with it, waiting for Dollar to get back up. As the man from Malawi slowly gets back to his feet and turns around, Kelley takes a swing at his larger opponent. Somehow, Dollar is able to stop the bat with his bare hands, grabbing it and tearing it away from Kelley. The force of Dollar pulling on the bat causes Kelley to stumble forward, right into the boot of Dollar, before he grabs hold of Kelley by the head and drops him with a DDT.
Johnno: "Dollar with a DDT, taking Shawn Kelley off his feet once again."
Ruddy: "Now, Dollar! Use that bat! Show him what you can do!"
Darren: "And Ruddy is still yelling orders at his client."
Dollar, doing as his manager says, picks up the baseball bat again. He waits as Kelley slowly begins to get back to his feet, before unloading with the bat across the back of his opponent. Kelley drops to the mat, holding his back in pain, as Dollar grins widely.
Darren: "Oh my God! What a shot from that bat, right across the back of Shawn Kelley."
Dollar brings the bat down again on the back of Kelley, causing his to writhe around in pain. Dropping the bat, Dollar drags Kelley back up to his feet and hooking an arm around his waist, lifts Kelley up and drops him down with a side backbreaker, causing more pain to Kelley's back. Dollar rolls Kelley over and makes the cover, but the referee doesn't count it. Dollar gets back to his feet and looks over at the referee. He moves towards the match official, who backs off, while trying to stay away from the barbed wire wrapped ropes.
Ruddy: "Dollar, no, wait! You have to tape his mouth up first. You have to put tape over Kelley's mouth."
Dollar looks over at Ruddy, realising his manager is correct. Dollar looks around the ring for the duct tape, but is unable to find it.
Johnno: "Dollar can't find the tape. He can't get a pinfall without it."
As he turns back around, Dollar is met with a superkick, taking him off his feet.
Darren: "Shawn Kelley with a superkick, out of nowhere!"
Kelley begins to search around the ring, looking for the duct tape. He looks over to the ref, hoping for some assistance, but the referee just shrugs, unable to provide the help that Kelley needs. Kelley begins to pick up the weapons lying around the ring. He picks up a metal rubbish bin, tipping it upside down. Amongst the various weapons that fall out, a roll of duct tape comes out too. Picking it up, Kelley grins, holding it up for all to see.
Darren: "Kelley has the tape. He found it."
Johnno: "Yeah and now all he has to do it tape up Dollar's mouth."
As Kelley proceeds to tear some of the tape off the roll, Dollar has managed to get back to his feet and is stalking Kelley from behind. Kelley turns back around as he gets some tape ready, only to be met with a thrusting superkick to the chin.
Darren & Johnno: "Top Dollar!"
Kelley falls to the mat, dropping the tape which is still partially unrolled. Dollar grabs the tape and proceeds to cover Kelley's mouth with it, making sure it is stuck tight.
Johnno: "He's got Kelley taped up, he can get a victory here."
Dollar drags Kelley back up to his feet, doubling him over with a boot to the midsection. Pushing his head down, Dollar puts Kelley in a standing head scissors, before lifting him up onto his shoulders. He steadies himself, holding Kelley up for a few moments, before driving him into the mat with a powerbomb.
Darren: "The Rumble!"
Dollar makes the cover as the referee counts it.
1...
2...
3!!
Dollar gets back up to his feet, raising his arm in victory.
Johnno: "I think Dollar thinks he has won the match."
Becky: "Dollar, with a pinfall, takes the lead one to nil!"
Dollar looks over at Becky, who has a slightly scared look on her face. Dollar turns back to his manager, who nods his head.
Ruddy: "It's two out of three falls. You have to beat him again, Dollar."
Although slightly annoyed at this outcome, Dollar grins that big ugly grin, glad to be allowed to destroy Shawn Kelley all over again. Dollar stands back as the referee tends to Kelley, helping remove the tape from his mouth. The referee steps back and calls for the bell to begin the second fall of the match. Dollar is immediately on the attack, charging forward and nailing a big boot to the chest of Shawn Kelley.
Darren: "The second fall begins now and Dollar has already taken Shawn Kelley off his feet."
Dollar drops down, raining hard rights and lefts to the face of Kelley, before getting back to his feet and dragging Kelley back to a vertical base. Dollar lifts Kelley up, holding him across his body, before throwing Kelley back over his head with a fallaway slam. Kelley rolls across the ring and straight into the barbed wire ropes. He yells out in pain as the barbs pierce his skin, before he manages to move away. Some small pieces of flesh get torn away as his back is now bleeding in a few spots. Dollar, meanwhile, has grabbed another weapon, this time a Singapore cane. He swings it back and forth a few times, getting a feel for it, before unloading with a strike to the chest of Kelley. The Memphis native drops to the mat, holding his chest in pain, as Dollar moves towards him. Standing over his opponent, Dollar brings the cane up, ready to strike again, but is stopped short as Kelley quickly thrusts a boot upwards into the stomach of Dollar, causing him to drop the cane. Kelley gets back to his feet as Dollar begins to move towards him again. Kelley quickly fires off a right hand, then follows up with a left, before spinning around and taking Dollar down with a clothesline.
Johnno: "The M Town Beatdown. Whoa, he was nearly in trouble then."
Kelley stops just short of running to the ropes, instead taking a few steps back and running forward, jumping up and landing a leg drop to Dollar. Kelley quickly scrambles for the tape, moving over to Dollar and proceeding to tear off some tape. Before he can get the tape in place though, Dollar shoots a hand up, grabbing Kelley by the throat. He slowly gets back to his feet, still holding Kelley by the throat, who has dropped the tape now. Dollar drives a boot into his stomach and lifts Kelley up for a powerbomb again.
Darren & Johnno: "The Rumble!"
Dollar grabs the tape and secures Kelley's mouth again, making the cover.
1...
2...
3!!
Darren: "He's done it! Dollar wins the Detention Centre Match!"
Becky: "Here is your winner...Dollar!"
The big man lifts himself up off of Kelley, raising a hand in victory knowing that he has now won the match. The sounds of "History Song" blast from the speakers as Dollar has his hand raised by the referee. Walking around the ring, Dollar keeps his fist up in the air, showing everyone that he is the survivor of the match.
Darren: "Ladies and gentlemen, that is all we have time for. On behalf of everyone here at Outback Thunder, goodnight folks!"
Dollar continues to parade around the ring in victory as the EAW logo and copyright information comes up on the screen, before everything fades to black.